"And I rather think it quite imperative that we get to the nub of the matter, right away" quoth FactGramps

With FactBoy absent and, as we speak, in a sanitorium in deepest Cambodia, researching a little known Fact about a rare and cabbage eating insect called Barry, his erstwhile and steeped-in-ancient-wisdom Grampa, FactGramps, has stopped filling his pipe and colostomy bag long enough to offer these insights into the world of Australian lore.

A mere snippet of the lightyears of knowledge crammed inside that yellow, liver-spotted head of his, which looks like the side-on view of a gerbil sitting on a cauliflower, what with his research into designing a Realistic and Natural Looking Toupe utterly failing to produce results so-far.

That aside.

Re: Definition:

Budgie Smuggler;

(noun, AU, slang); The style of mens swimming costume which covers the bottom and forms a pouch at the front, as worn in surf lifesaving and in swimming races; any item of male bathing costume or underwear that encloses the wearer's genitalia in a manner that resembles the concealment of a budgerigar:

In common conversation among the usual suspect members of the general public such utterances as the henceforth may be heard spoken aloud: "and who could forget his exhibitionism when he stepped out of the sea this week in a pair of swimmers referred to universally as budgie-smugglers"; or, more reasonably to be assumed to be the case when such as the likes of "Mate, can't wait to wear me new budgie smugglers to the beach, gonna accent my dong" is heard spoken.

For anyone who does not know, or is ignorant of the Australian version of the English language,:

• 'Baastard' : is a term of endearment
• 'Ya Bastard!' : equates to 'hello'
• 'Fekin baastard!' : Nice to see you
• 'Bottle-o' : off license or liquor shop (suffix any word with an -o, and it becomes immediately recognizable, warm and friendly, and inimitably Ozzie: see also arvo, Abo, Fisho, Garbo, Salvo, Robbo, Wayno, Jonno, Matto)
• 'Numbnuts' : a derogatory term, referring to an individuals innate state of mind. "Micko? Nah! He's a numbnuts".
• 'Old mate' (noun) : applicable to a person, singular, when their name has been forgotten; e.g. "G'day... Old mate" or "I was talking to your friend... Old Mate over there"
• 'Op Shop' : a charity shop; 'Opportunity Shopping'; "get yer gladrags on we're going op shopping luv"
• 'Brown-eyed mullet' : a turd in the sea.
• 'Bushman's hanky' : Emitting nasal mucus by placing one index finger on the outside of the nose.
• 'Dead dingo's donger, as dry as a' : dry, very
• 'chook': chicken.
• 'Manchester' : Household linen, eg sheets etc.
• 'Shit house' (adj.) : of poor quality, unenjoyable.
• 'Show pony' : someone who tries hard, by his dress or behaviour, to impress those around him.
• 'Ute' : utility vehicle, pickup truck. Not to be confused with the Scandinavian word 'Ūte', which translates in Australian as "speak Enlgish ya silly Welsh Baastard".

Shuffling off to fill his Brandy tumbler with warm milk and to snort a nasal decongestant before an early bedtime but not before feeding the cat and watching the news headlines FactGramps departs, leaving the world of Knowledge a better place for his having woken himself up from his late-evening, post-early evening, pre-proper-snooze.

"Now Bugger orf an leave it for your own fact find get em ourself", he says from the next room as a damp slipper is hurled and lands by my feet with a squib-like squelch.